Only Life Among The Dead
by JoKuL FrOsTi
Summary: My name? Eva Lydia Todd. Spirit of the dead. friends with Jack Frost, Guardians. i collect the souls of the dead, and i am not well liked, and i don't even really have friends. the guardains speak to me, and are friendly, but i'm not really a friend. i like it that way. so this is my story. read and find out about who death is.
1. eva todd: cursed?

**hey people. okay, so this is the story of Eva. she's a character in many of my stories. sheis the spirit of death. i wanted to do a story for her, because she is so important to many of my plots. oh, and in case anyone cares. my life sucks right now and i now know what jack frost felt like when he was invisible. well, anyways. here you go, enjoy. **

**- All around me -**

my name? Eva Lydia Todd. My age? I'm seventeen, going on eighteen. Hair color? the lightest blonde you will ever see. eye color? Sky blue. siblings? 5, only two survived.a six year old brother and a four year old sister. James and Sophia. Parents? Dead. Place of residence?i live in a cabin near the ClearWater River. Status? single. i mean, well. there was THomas. he was my best friend. since we were little, actually. he was twenty. i liked him. i mean, who couldn't? and who didn't? but he didn't return the feelings. and he was almost never here. he was a blacksmith, and in the warm seasons, he would leave to a bigger town to do work. in winter, he would return to our little village of Oaksden. so yeah, single. Goals in life? live long enough to make sure my little brother and sister would make it in the world. and now you know me. Eva lydia Todd, of oaksden.

my fingers were numb inside the worn, thin, patched mittens i wore. i carried with me a chipped bucket and an ice pick plus a hammer. my footsteps crunched in the thick snow. i made it to the river bank. i stepped out onto the icy cover, tapping it with my walking stick. i found a stable patch. i got down on my knees and began to chip away at the ice with pick and hammer. when i had a hole the size of a plate, i rubbed my gloved hands together then filled my bucket with the icy water. i grabbed my stuff and skidded to the bank, then stomped back to the cabin, whose warm light glinted off the snow. i opened the door and kicked the snow off my boots. i walked across the floorboards to a dining chair. i slipped off my boots, my gloves and jacket, dumping them all by the door. "Jimmie! Soph! I'm home!" it was quiet in the house. too quiet... i set the bucket down on the table. "Jimmie...? Sophia...?" they were nowhere to be- "Eeepp!" someone grabbed me from behind. they set me down and i turned to see who it was, even though there was no mistaking the hearty laughter. my blue eyes met his bright hazel ones. "Thomas!" i said, hugging him excitedly. Jimmie and Soph ran out, laughing. "I missed you!you weren't supposed to be back till next week! what are you doing here?!" "i wanted to surprise you!" he said. i hugged him tighter. "I missed you so much!" i said, burrying my head in his chest. he smelled of pine and smoke with a hint of tangy metal. he was a blacksnith after all. i ruffled his dark blonde curls, stretching up on my toes, as he was nearly a head taller than me. the giggles of my siblings brought me back to reality, and i reluctantly tore my eyes away from his perfect face. i hugged my siblings, picking them up. "Come on, lets head back to my house. my family's waiting up." i nodded. he buckled up Jimmie and and i suited up along with soph. we set out, each with a child in hand, and made our way to his hose, which lay two miles out. we arrived with the door open, laughter and warmth and the smell of good food. His mother welcomed us in. "Hello sweetheart." she said, hugging me. she was a head shorter than me. a widow of seven years, she looked after the three babes inher house, the oldest of eight being hers, the other two Eliza's. eliza was thomas's older sister. as it turned out, most of the people in our village were there to welcome him back. as i stepped through the room, to help his mother, tara in the kitchen, i heard the whispers begin. _Here we go... _i rolled my eyes as two church, god praising women whispered behindmy back. do you want to know what they were whispering about? you do? good. cuz you were gonna hear about it anyways. deal with it.

what they were whispering about was my curse. well, i was not actually cursed like all those frilly-girly princesses in those fairytales. the whole village just thought i was. my curse was that all who got close to me would die. this began when i was little. my family were good people. my father was the local carpenter, my mother, well, everyone loved her. and i was the perfect little angel. we were happy. i had three siblings. an older brother, andrew, and two older sisters, amy and sally, the twins. Sally got sick with an unknown disease. my brother decided the answers would be in the city. he left. never came back. he found the medicine, and sent it to our family, but that night, he was muged, and died in the street. the medicine reached us literally a minute too late. they knocked on the door right after the doctor pronounced her dead. it was only me , my parents andamy were no longer happy. mydad would stay at his shop in town late,my mother would barely speak. she just wandered around the house, getting thinner. my sister, Amy, who was fourteen at the time, was my caretaker. she raised me basiaclly. i depended on her. i was too young back then to know what the pink, thin lines across her arms meant. until it was too late. i came home from school one day. mother was wondering around the yard. dad was at shop. i came in the house. "Amy! i home!" i said. silence. i went into my room, the room i shared with her. it wasn't exactly a room. it was a loft, stretching across half of the house. Amy was lying on the bed. i shook her. "C'mon Amy. wake up. wanna go play outside? amy?" the blankets were wet. my hands came away red. i crawled onto te bed, shaking her. her wrists were slit, blood pouring out. "AMY! AMY! PLEASE WAKE UP! AMY?!" my mother was drawn in by my started screaming. "Eva, go get your father!" she choked out. i did as i was told. i ran as fast as i could. i ran through the town. i ran into my papa's shop. "papa! papa!" he was shocked at my bloodstained clothes. "It's amy!" i cried. he burst out the door, leaving me there, covered in my sister's blood. i collapsed to the ground crying. thomas found me and carried me to his mom. i was the only one left then. my sister left a letter apoligizing to me for abandoning me. my mother had four still-births. then she had Jimmie. i had a purpose now. i had someone who needed me. i took care of him. two years later she had Sophia. and died in birth. my dad had been going gambling in a nearby town for awhile now. his debt caught up to him. his body was found in ditch, faced bashed in. i'll sav you the gory details. i was thirteen at the time, and on my own. except i wasn't. i had two babies that needed mebecause our parents were dead. i was offered to come and live with thomas and his family, but theirs was such a large one already, and they most certainly did not need three extra mouths to feed. for the first years or so, tara and thomas would stop by daily. thomas would do all the hard work,and tara would help me do the domestic work. but soon their family needed more money, and as the eldest, it fell to thomas's shoulders. and i was alone again. did i mention that thomas's dad deid saving me? riding lesson's. not mine. some rich girl ata county fair in another town. she lost control over her horse. it charged. i was with thomas and his dad. he jumped in the way. the horse reared. i got a bruise. he got a grave. that's what...? that was ten new graves in the last few years tied to me. _Ten. _no wonder they thought i was cursed. but, so, yeah. that is the history of me. oh, and i have also gotten kicked out of school because i kinda beat a girl sensless because she insulted me sister amy. so what do you think? am i cursed?

**Hey guys! what do you think? sad, i know. but she needed a sad/bad past. R&R pretty please?**


	2. christmas wishes

**Hey Snowflakes! hows it going? good? good. bad? tell me wats buggin you. i'm here to listen. (and write of course!) AQ, thanks for favin this story. hey, first person to reveiw this story, i'l do a request for you. any story you want. but it cnt be anything inapropreit. here you guys go. i give you... chapter two! ;3**

**- Christmas Wishes-**

i helped tara serve the food. i didn't socialize beyond that. the table was set with the food, and Tara rang the bell that hung on the kitchen door. i hid in the kitchen as everyone passed by. they sat down, not noticing my absence. almost not noticing it. i watched as thomas looked around, then leaned in towards his mother. he said something, then she looked around, and shook her head. he looked around, and i didn't duck in time to stay hidden. he got up, excusing himself. he came into the kitchen, pushing the door slightly to hide us from veiw of nosy eyes. "Eva." he breathed. "Yes?" i said, busying myself with cleaning the counter. he turned me to face him, upping my face in his strong hands, smiling. "What in the bloody hell are youdoing in here? you should be out there, socailizing." he said. "who is thereto socailize with? everyone in there despises me." "they do not!" "name one person who doesn't despise me." he seemed to think for a bit. "my mother. my sisters, my brothers, and my nephews." "okay, people besides your family." "me?" "You say that as if t'were a question. do you question wether or not you despise me?" "I do not despise you Eva." "you should." i muttered. he was immedaitly defensive. "Eva! Do not even dare to think like that! Ever! youswore to never think like that again. you promised." his voice dropped at the last bit. what i had promised? let me explain. after my parent's death, for the first year or so, i was depressed. it was ahard year. the rumors had already started. they started at the funeral. i could hear them. and i began to believe them. i started to hate myself. distance myself from others. Thomas had tried to get me to communicate, make some sort of reaction. the day i had sworn to him, promised to him, that i would never believe in those horrid rumors was the day i almost deid. it was a hard winter. thomas's family was in hard times. at the time, for most of the time, i was out of body. it was in the middle of the night. something woke me up from my dream-wake i was in. i got up, and decided it was a good time to walk. so i went outside. it was frigid out. a blizzard was about to strike. i was oblivious to these of course. i wandered out into the ice. smart, huh? well, i _was_ kinda out of it. Thomas, thank my not-so-lucky stars, had decided to check on us, to make sure we had enough to last the storm. he saw my figure out among the white. "Eva! Eva!" i did not respond. he ran out to me. and he savedmy life, because he pulled me off the ice just as it broke up. i would have fallen through had it not been for him. and suddenly, seeing how close i had been to joining those in the ground, reality seem to seep back into me. i promised him that, and i have never listened to them since. but i stilllhad my weak moments. "I know. I am sorry Thomas. i will not do it again." he took my hand in his. " Come on. lets go back out. before they get any ideas." he teased. we left,and took our seats. as soon as he sat, the questions began. the men asked of business and prospects in the city, and if they were good, which they were this year, would say maybe they would move the family there and make something of themselves. they never did. the wives would ask of the latest fashions. the children asked of new games and toys. the typical. our hands were clasped together, underneath the table. Angelique, a pretty blonde, and the ms. popular who was trying for Thomas's attention.(cofcof hand in marriagecof cof) she reached her hand across the table to place it on his. " i want to celebrate your return _personally_." she whispered,winking,oblivious to me. when she turned her attention to one of her followers, he rolled his eyes at me. i surpressed a laugh. the dinner was finished, and only a few stayed, but soon they were gone too. i helped tara clean up, washing the dishes. when everything was done, i looked out the window. it was dark out, and a little breezy. it was snowing. "hm..." i said,biting my lip. " Its alright right now out there, but you never know ifit'll turn into a storm." "you're welcome to stay the night here." i looked back outside." Mmm.. nah. we'll be fine. if it gets bad, we'll turn around." i said. i bid tara and thomas and the others goodbye after getting the kids suited up. we set out, and were home in no time. i put them to bed. i don't think they realized what tomorrow was. i didn't keep a calendar for this reason. tomorrow was christmas. a pain in my heart stung. i had nothing to give them. that's why i never let them know when christmas was.

i woke up in the morning, as the first light of day appeared in the frosty window. i climbed down the ladder from my loft, and headed to the room that Jimmie and Soph shared. i woke them up, and already hyper, they ran out. i followed them. and stopped in my tracks. there was a full, perfect christmas tree, lit up and everything. and there were dozens of beautifully wrapped gifts under it. there was even a christmas breakfast on the table. _WHAT_?! WHERE IN THE BLAZES DID ALL THIS COME FROM?! "Eva! Eva! Santa came!" they cheered happily. They began sorting through the gifts, by name. " Jimmie, Sophia, Breakfast first." i said, clapping my hands together. they aww..., but came up to the table. we were about to eat when a knock came on the door. i got up. Thomas was at the door with his family. "Merry Christmas!" he said. i let them in. we set extra places, and there was more than enough food to spare for them. we ate, then set the dishes in the wash bin. "Ok, you can open them now." i said to Sophia and Jimmie. it was like telling a mosquito to bite. they flew to the gifts, grabbing a present each. they tore open gift after gift, their faces geting happier and happier. thomas came up begind me. "I thought you didn't do christmas." "I don't." "then whats this? easter?" he joked. "i don't know. it was just here when we got up." "Maybe there really is a santa claus." "well then where was he last year, and the year before that?" i challenged. " Wrong adress?" he guessed. my eyes widened in realization. "Wait. why you little...! you brought all of this! how did you get in?" i said, keeping my voice a whisper. "Guilty. you forget to take back your key from a few years ago." i held my hand out. he sghed, and placed it in my hand. the kids were done opening(more like tearing open) the gifts. among those was two brand new sleds, just the right size for my little siblings. we buttoned them up, and when everyone else was ready, we headed out to the hills to sled. we spent the day playing in the snow. i watched them play, they were so happy. "I can never thank you enough Thomas. this must have cost a fortune. but i'll pay you back." i said. "Eva. take a walk with me." he said sternly. we walked a ways off, into the trees. "What is it? did i do something?" "yes. you always assume that you have to pay back everything, you're always so serious. haven't you ever heard of a gift? when's the last time you truly smiled? huh? You used to be so carefree and daring and adventoruous. now you're all hard work and deadlines and paying back every cent of every debt, even when its not due. What happened to the girl who didn't care what others thought, who led me on adventures? what happend to that girl?" i looked down at my feet, the shadow of a crow passing overhead. i closed my tears, fighting tears. What had happened to that girl? when had i gone from her, to this? "That girl is gone." i said, barely a whisper. but he heard. " Well, tell her for me, that i miss her." he said, before walking off. we didn't speak for the rest of the day. he wouldn't meet my eye. but in truth, i wouldn't meet his either. he and his family went home when it got dark. so did we. we got in, and took off our jackets. "Just make sure you're in bed before dawn." i said to the kids, as i stumbled off to my bed. i changed numbly into my nightgown and crawled onto the bed. i tucked my knees into my chest. i was crying. i didn't cry, unless thomas had something to do with it. he was the only one i let my guard down with, the only one i trusted. he knows me, well, knew me better than even i did. i loooked through my frosted window up at the full moon, whose glow lit my face, and my tears. "Please. Please, if there is anyon out there to hear me. Please. let everything be okay in the end. don't let me lose my only friend. please..."i prayed. i crawled under the covers and cried myself to sleep. _Don't worry Eva Todd. Everything will be fine in the end. got to sleep. _


	3. heavy hearts go sinking

**Hey guys! any reveiws yet? eh?eh? no? okay... please reveiw. it makes me feel like someone's actually reading my story. please? well, anyways... here you go! I wont keep you longer!**

Heavy Hearts go sinking

the snow began to melt. daisies turned into poppies and the other wildflowers of summer. the river ran low, low enough to let the children run wild in it. i did this now. i gave them old clothes, chopped up, to mimik swim clothes. i watched them from the pebbly shore, my toes in the water. others' laughter echoed off the water. i looked up to see Jeffy, Tabby, and Michael. Tara and Eliza's children.i looked around for their mothers as they ran to join Jimmie and Soph, and spotted them further down the shore. I smiled,and waved to them. in the past months, i had thought over what Thomas had said to me, and had changed. i hadbecome more carefree, a little less responsible. i took time to slow down and look at life, to watch the rose bloom slowly. i let Jimmie and Soph run on ahead with the other kids, i took them on adventures. i wasn't doing stuff that could actually get someone killed, no, i was just... free-er. i hardly ever had my hair pulled up intothat god aweful tight bun anymore. i let it hang down, or tied it in a loose braid. i was almost always barefoot. I sang openly, and danced too, i went to the little village parties. i was happy. until i saw the person behind Tara and Eliza as they got closer. we hadn't spoken to eachother since that day in winter. Tara and Eliza laid out the picnic they had packed next to me. "Hello there Sweetie!" said Tara joyfully. Eliza smiled and waved. "Saw you skipped sunday church." said tara secretly. Thomas was still a ways away. "yeah, i just didn't feel like going." i said. "My, it seems we have a different Eva standing before us! what happened my darling? you used to be the old matronly maid, now look at you! as youthful and spriteful as twere you were a child again!" she said, laughing. i nodded, laughing. "So how come its been so long since we've seen you at the house? you ain't growing tired of us now, are you?" "No, i'vejust been busy living life." i said. thomas waded out into the water, playing with the kids. He would make Angelique a good husband someday. it wasn't officail, but everyone knew they would get marreid, because that was just how it was. after a while, Tara and Eliza started up their own conversation,and i left the group with the excuse of "Going for a walk." i followed the dirt path, the stones crunching under my bare feet. it didn't hurt. i walked on for a little while, listening to the birds sing, when i came to an outcroping. it was a large boulder that stuck out above the river, downriver from them enough to not be noticed, but stil keep an eye on them.i watched them play, laughing. they didn't miss me, but they would if i were gone too long. that comforted me. i would be missed if anything happened, but i would make sure nothing would. isat down on a mossy patch, my back to a log, tucking my knees into my chest. the slight breeze played with my thin, patched skirt. i rufused to wear the beautiful dresses Thomas had bought me in the cty, especailly considering i spent most my days gettting the work in the feilds done, then playing in the dirt with my siblings. they would have been destroyed. the wind brought cool releif to my face from the sizzling sun. it tugged at my hair and skirt. i looked up at the blue sky, smiled, sighed, and closed my eyes. i was happy. then i heard a twig snap behind me. i was instantly alert. i looked down to my group. one of them was missing... "Eva." he breathed. it had been so lng since he had spoken my name like that. "Thomas?" i said. he sat down next to me. i peekedat him from behind my hair. "Now where'd you go?" he smirked, then brushed it away, out of my face. "See... Hello there old friend. it's been a long time. its nice to see you again.i missed you." he said. i smiled at him. " imissed you too,Tommy." i squeaked,using the name i used to call him when we were young. we didn't say anything after that. we didn't have to. all was forgiven. all was right again. I fell asleep with his arm around me. when i woke up, the burnt goldof asummer sunset lit the world at an angle. i sat up. Thomas was asleep next to me. i got up, brushing the dried grass and moss off my clothes. i turned back. Thomas was up now. "H'lo sleeping beauty." i joked. he smiled. " Hullo sunshine." he said sleepily. i kicked a stone. it skidded off the bouldar and plopped into the water,sinking. i remembered aline froma poetry booki had. "Heavy hearts, can not fly. instead their arms go linking, and they go sinking." i said. "Sinking?but our hearts are free. at least mine is. and if mine is, i will take you up with me, wether you like it or not. i will not allow you to sink." "you uck at rhyming." isaid. "not all poetry rhymes." he countered. i laughed."look, see?" he said. he picked up black stone that had little dips and holes in it. "you see this? Thisisvolcanic. probably from an eruption thousands of years ago. Watch this." he tossedit down to the water. it plopped into it, and sunk out of veiw. "kay... you just proved that even specail rocks will sink." "Keep watching." i did. a moment or two later,the rock bobbed up, floating. it bobbed up and down on the water's surface. "it floats." i said. "yep. not all stones sink Eva.i wont let you sink." "Come on, its getting late. we'll be missed." i took his hand in mine and we headed back to the river. i walked in the shallows, the frayed end of my skirt getting wet. we were walking back when i spotted it. the rock he had thrown. i picked it up. it fit perfectly into my palm. "a reminder." i said. we made it backto the house. Tara had dinner cooking in full swing. "There you are youngsters! we was about to come en' git ya." "How long were we gone?" "Well, a few hours. I came upto git ya, but you looked so adorable, i just had to leave you." she said. tara served dinner on the table we had set outside. Tara was the village cook, famous for every dish. we finsihed eating and cleaned up. the sun was a thin line on the horizon, the sky a light lavendar. fireflies came out, beginning their dance. "Faeries!" cried sophia. her and the others ran out, attempting to catch them. i laughed. Oh, to be young and innocent again. "by the way... your birthday is in a week." thomas said. " Ugh." i said, slapping my forehead. i had spent so much time living in the moment, i forgot to plan past the next day. "Oh, god. my birthday... i forgot..." "You'll be turning eighteen, of marrying age..." "don't remind me. i already haveenough trouble with petty school boys wanting hat marriage brings." i said, rollin my eyes. i may be cursed, but that didn't stop the local boys from eyeing me and makng approaches. our village was not as innocent as it seemed. "What are you gonna do for your birthday?" he asked. "Hide, cuz they'll come running, i swear. hey, can i borrow that hunting gun of yours? just to keep them off my property?" i joked. he laughed. " No, seriously. i might need it. no, i'm just joking." i said, laughing. we watchedthe kids playing, tara and eva knitting. "i wish, things could stay like this forever." i said. "I know, but thats not how things work. unfortunetly. " "yeah... but it doesn't hurt to wish." i said. "it doesn't hurt." he said, shrugging. soon, it got to be late, and his family went home. i tucked Sophia and Jimmie in. "Eva?" "Yes?" "Is uncle thomas gonna be our daddy?" "What? No. what gives you that idea?" i asked, smoothing back Sophia's hair into a braid. " Cuz you two likes eachother." "As friends." "No, hes gonna marry you, and it'll be just like in a fairytale!" she cheered. i rolled my eyes. it did sound tempting... "Sorry Soph, but i don't think thats gonna happen." i said. "Why?" "Because, well, he's gonna marry someone whose... better fit for him to marry, in the eyes of the town." i said. was i really having this conversation with my four ear old sister? oh, amy, what would you have done? i thought. " Well, it doesn't matter what they think!" she said indignantly, crossing her arms and puffing out her lips. "and it is bed time, not arguement time. go to sleep little one." i said, kissing the tip of her nose. she yawned involintairy, and i tucked her in. Jimmie was already out. i smiled down at her. Oh, to be young and have such dreams as that. i left them dreaming. i changed into my nightgown, and braided my hair. i wasn't going to bed yet. if you spend the day at play, you have to find time to do the chores, no matter how much it bores. Amy had made that up to get me to work. i washed the dishes, swept the floor, washed the laundry, hanging it out on the line to dry in tomorrow's sun, cleaned up after the kids, and sewed new patches and made the clothes longer. they were getting so big. when i had done all there was to do, i crawled into bed, weary. _Sweet dreams Eva. only good is to come. _

**whatchya think guys? huh?huh? someone, please review! I'm so lonely... *snflsnflsnfl* well, anyways, i hope you enjoyed it, cuz i enjoyed writing it! luv ya'll!**


	4. important, please read

to anyone reading these stories, I have decided to pull them from my account. they are saved to a USB, and I will continue to work and improve upon them, slowly re uploading them. the reason i'm doing this is because of lack of feedback, and I went back and read som and they quite frankly sucked. so, if you were a fan of this story, don't worry, it'll be better in the future. until then, bye!

love,

jokul.


End file.
